So, I've realized today that with God there is no plan B. You can think that you have no idea where you are going in life, you can feel lost. But with God, He does everything for a reason. He has a purpose for me, so I'm not going to question it. I'm giving God complete control, and I'm trusting in Him to take me to somewhere amazing.

I know that I need God in my life. That He died that I might live. And that is what I'm celebrating this Christmas.

Clarity

Okay, so, I'm really falling down. I'm falling apart. I'm in a perfect possition to pray. I know this. I need to ask God to come down here and save me, save me from myself. Lord, I'm scared. I'm dabbling in things that can kill me. I'm basically sinning with my eating disorder. Today, my boyfriend of 15 months, the love of my life, asked me if I was still doing my eating disorder, and I lied to his face. I said, no I stopped. But I haven't stopped. Lord, HELP ME. Why can't I see what you see in me?

This ED has taken so much from me. My ability to see myself clearly in Your eyes. My ability to focus on things,like school work, and I'm a freshman in college, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to fail out. Lord, come save me.